Repurposed for the Garden: Critter Keeper Offer (aka Tie a Bag Around It)

Kangaroo apple (Solanum laciniatum) is one in a long line of marginally edible foods that I have been experimenting with in the garden. The fruits are considered poisonous when green and unripe, and edible when they turn orange.

That hasn’t stopped the squirrels. As I waited patiently for the fruit to ripen so I could have my first taste, the squirrels got there ahead of me and stole their fill while the fruit was still green, rock hard, and supposedly poisonous. Not only did it not kill them or give them so much as a tummy ache, they probably liked this plant more than any other treat in the garden. Proving once again that the squirrels are superior beings that will be roaming the earth harassing and poaching from some other more evolved humanoid-type creature in the distant future once the aliens have come in the name of interplanetary peace but then accidentally reveal their true intention to farm us for food, which leads to a terrible and epic battle for the lives of all humankind.

Spoiler: We do not win. Squirrels survive on the planet for another 50 million years.

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Hahms Gelbe Topftomate

First there is the name, which gives me a chuckle every time I say it as it sounds like the site of an epic Trolls versus Elves battle in The Lord of the Rings.

And there was great despair in the land, for the blood of many fearless warriors was spilled in the great battle at Hahms Gelbe…

It feels like “vanquished” should be used in there somewhere. Or perhaps Hahms Gelbe is a badlands where people are sent to exile. “He was doomed to live out his final days as a lost soul wandering wearily through the blackened and barren desert of Hahms Gelbe.

Needless to say, I’d better not quit my day job as a garden writer. Doesn’t look like I’ll be making my millions ghost writing fantasy fiction for World of Warcraft fans.

Anyways…..

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Reflecting on 2010

Year Start

I spent the first week of 2010 out right, visiting friends on an organic food farm in the Soufriere area of St. Lucia. Our friend David lived there at the time, growing food for the ultra luxurious Jade Mountain Resort.

The property, called Emerald House, was an old chocolate plantation at one time. A small section of cacao trees remain, many of which have vanilla vines (a second crop) growing up the trunks. Unfortunately, it wasn’t vanilla season, but the cacao pods were fantastic and it was exciting to see so many familiar tropical houseplants growing like ground cover underneath the trees.

To be honest, after weeks of walking hot roads in Barbados and hiking up and down brutal mountain hills in Dominica, we spent most of our time in St. Lucia loafing around (I hardly took any photos), but we did help with some of the farm harvest.

The most memorable was cutting red and pink ginger flowers (Alpinia purpurata) for floral arrangements. Ginger plants are very tall and they were colonized by two types of ants: one with a bite that stung, and one with a bite that stung like HELLFIRE. Walking among the tall plants and harvesting flower stems without being bit was a challenge. I go bit once, but fortunately it was from the lesser ant. Our friend John was bit on the inner thigh by one of the nasty ants, the consequence of which was momentary concern about the future of his reproductive organs!

Year End

Unfortunately, I am not ending 2010, nor beginning 2011 in a warm and sunny place. It is cold and snowy here. We picked the wrong year to stay home. However, I do have a new garden to plan this winter, a south-facing, unheated porch that functions as a cold greenhouse (although some plants froze. But that is another story, for another day), and a basement (hooray!) where I have been able to set up a 4 foot wide, D.I.Y grow light unit that houses the plants that can’t fit into my sunny office window. I currently have 2 shelves filled, and a third will function as my new seed starting station in the coming months.

In my former home, the plants were cramped into a ramshackle unit that I cobbled together using whatever I could fit into a tiny corner of my office. Needless to say, this new system is a whole lot better.

Most Surreal Experience of 2010: It’s a toss-up between being profiled in Oprah magazine and gardening chit-chat via email with Bryan Adams. “Cuts Like a Knife” came on the radio the other day while I was in a cafe and my head kind of exploded for a minute. The song used to prompt memories of trips to the beach as a kid or taping videos on our first VCR via shows like Video Hits and Good Rockin’ Tonite. Now it makes me think of courgettes.

Favourite Post of the Year: The Requirement to Garden. I am proudest of this one. I also like: On Daffodils, Whimsy Must Live, Stealing Plants? You Suck, and What Makes a Good Gardener?.

Favourite Plant of the Year: Choosing a favourite is always difficult, especially when I see so many new plants every year. My favourite plant is usually the one in front of me in any given moment. That said, for purely sentimental reasons, I have to choose my very first Japanese Maple.

Spade lotus sculpture at Merlin’s Hollow

Favourite Garden Visited: I visited a lot of gorgeous gardens last year. It was a very good year in that respect. Unfortunately, the only one I posted about was Brian Bixley’s garden, Lilac Tree Farm. In 2011 I resolve to post more photos of the beautiful Edens I am fortunate enough to visit!

Favourite Picture Posted in 2010: Bromeliads in the Valley of Desolation. I took it in late December 2009, but it took forever to get the film processed and scanned. I still have film from October 2009 that hasn’t been developed! It’s not the best photo I have taken in the past year, but it is my favourite because it reminds me of hiking through the most amazing landscape I have ever experienced. I hope to see it again someday.

Photo by Gayla Trail  All Rights Reserved

More Highlights of 2010:

The hardest gardening-related thing I did in 2010 was disassembling my Roof Garden. I took it apart by myself, mostly in the dark (and the cold), and all in a matter of hours. That was all the time I had to do it in. The whole experience sucked ass. For over a decade it was my personal sanctuary and a place of so much learning. Goodbye old friend.

The coming year brings a new gardening space and what has already turned into an epic battle with the Legion of tomcats. They are shitting AND SPRAYING!

What are your reflections for 2010?

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