The other day I bought Martha Stewart Living. The only reason I bought it was because someone in the forums mentioned that there was an article about Christmas cactus in it. I spent $4.75 for one lousy article. However, as I started thumbing through it, I started feeling festive because Martha makes it look so damn easy!
There’s an article on how to make a Yuletide topiary using carnations. It’s really pretty but I figured it would be a waste of money for something that will only last for a few days. It’s not like I have hoards of people coming by my house (and if they do, it’s never when my house is clean). Then I wondered if I sprayed it with shellac or something of the like, would it last forever? I doubt it. I decided to pass on that idea.
Another article was on how to make ornaments out of pine cones. I could do that as it is really easy to do. Only there aren’t any pine cones on the ground where I live, so I may as well buy some that have already been made and save myself the hassle.
I want to make a garland out of holly and cedar garland just like the one that is on Martha’s door. My front door area is in a similar style as hers so it would look cool. I don’t have a holly bush, but there’s a house down the street that has a huge one. I wonder if they would notice if I whacked off one half of their bush. I’ve never seen cedar garland. I think Hobby Lobby only sells the "faux" pine stuff. Substitutions will not do.
My husband was laughing when he saw me reading MSL and asked me if I was feeling crafty. I told him that I was, indeed, feeling very crafty (cue the Beastie Boys song, "She’s Crafty"), but in order to become crafty, I needed to buy things. His reply was, "No. You don’t".
So now my bubble has been burst. I really don’t have the time or patience to do crafts like Martha’s. I will bake the same cookies every year (despite buying tons of magazines looking for new recipes) and I will suck at decorating them. My almost 8 year old son asked me why my cookies never looked like the ones in the magazines and I ignored him. I will also put out the same semi-cheesy decorations that I do every year. And I will be the one who ends up eating all the Christmas cookies.
Coming soon! Pictures! Really!
Everyone's got something to say about Queen Martha How about you?
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